The big questions

Four year olds make me giggle. I love how they are trying so passionately to make sense of their world. Chelsea has cracked me up lately with her out of the blue questions and philosophies.

"How did God make bottom cracks? He didn't colour us in did he? He didn't paint us eh?"

Lately she has been worried about bees.
"I wish God made me a bee because then I wouldn't get stung. Do you think you could buy me a bee costume Mummy? Then they wouldn't sting me."

Dom is now a wise (cough) six year old and his questions are far more important.
"Mum, my friend said the S word at school today. It is so bad that you can just say the first letter and call it the S word isn't it? The word is Stupid eh?"
"But what is the f word Mum?" He sat there trying to think of bad words that start with f...to no avail. Phew, I am safe until next time! Thank goodness for his Catholic school!

Childrens dreams

When I signed up to have children, I naively assumed that they would be quite similar to my husband and I. Surely if they came from us, their interests and personality would blend in?
To some degree this is true, we all gel together quite nicely as a family. However, my boy's aspirations couldn't be more different from ours. He has always been incredibly active, happiest when he is with a ball of some sort, most content when he is challenged physically. I used to think it was just his young age, but now I'm accepting that it's him. My husband was bought up by his Mother to go shopping at Smith & Caughey's as a treat. He never had a huge amount of exposure to sports. I had a fair amount of exposure but did not excel in any way. We were both brought up with an emphasis and appreciation of the arts - not sports!
In saying that, both of us had family members who were great at sports. Perhaps this is where Dominik gets it from. He is passionate about Tennis. To the point where it's an obsession. He longs to be a professional player and he practices at every spare moment.
This has thrown us a curve ball, on the weekends that is all he wants to do. Our focus has had to adapt to incorporate this new interest. My husband is learning tennis with him and finding it rather enjoyable. I spend a lot of time at the local tennis club watching him and together we follow the tournaments and read books about the sport. I'm not quite sure where this is all going to take us, but I can't see Dominik's obsession waning anytime soon. Fortunately, Bob and I are finding joy in supporting him. The question is, what will Chelsea be interested in? At the moment it's dressing up and storytelling which I can handle. But who's to say she won't throw us a curve ball too?!

My favourite Kid-Things

I have so many favourite things. Thought I'd start my own top ten for those with kids. In no particular order, here goes...

Number One Good Old Fashioned Palet Paints. I used to love these at school and I still love them now. They are so easy to use with kids and a great way to learn about mixing colours. It's a quick, easy way to offer painting and I've even known some to use them as face paints! They do stain clothes though, but it's all worth it. And they are cheap. Just ten dollars from the Playcentre Shop and they will last you forever.

Number Two I don't own them yet but I absolutely covet Planetbox lunchboxes. I want three of them. I loathe plastic lunchboxes that break and are awkward to clean. I love Bento style lunchboxes and these are the best I've seen.

SAHM and Community

I've always worked in communities, but to some degree have been on the outside looking in. I guess when we were kids were were strongly attached to our community but as we grew up and moved into fulltime work the community had less of a stronghold.

Now as a Mum, working part time (at a Kindy within our community) I have realised just what a wonderful thing it is. Picking up kids after school, chatting with other Mums, siblings mixing and support offered. I now have plenty of people that my children know and trust, and if I'm running late to school pick up I know that I have other parents I can call on to help.

Both my kids have gone to daycare part time, that is I pick the hours and the majority of the children at the centre are there all day. I barely met any other parents as our pick up/drop off times were different. There were no time for catch ups as everyone was working and kids days were filled up with care and weekends catching up on everything else.

In complete contrast has been Kindy. At our Kindy there are set sessions- four year olds go in the mornings and the three year olds attend the afternoon. Often the best networking happens when we're waiting to pick up our kids from the last mat time. It is easy to get to know parents this way and easy for the kids to meet their friends parents. Play afternoons are arranged after Kindy and carpooling shared.

As a Teacher, I've also noticed the difference at Kindy when kids are bonded with their community. You can tell the ones that catch up outside Kindergarten- they all hang out. It is much harder for those who aren't 'known' in out of Kindy circles. My son has gone to school with whole network of Kindy friends. Loved kids from great families. He knows this is his community. The local Santa Parade is a testament to this. The kids are constantly waving to other families that they know.

I feel sad for the community vibe our grandparents were proud of. It's going. Living in our city, two full time incomes is becoming essential for providing the basics. Mums and Dads are rightly keen to continue their careers and choices are diminishing. I am so lucky to be working in a place where I can also network within my community and reap the benefits of this. Communities are becoming less centred around locality and more related to work and meeting places. Perhaps I'm old fashioned at heart, but I'm loving my community.

Protecting my cubs

It's not the first time it's happened. My five year old came home and told me that one of his good friends told him (once again) that he couldn't play with the group of kids that he always plays with. He was left with no friends. My heart broke. His didn't look broken, but was fairly matter of fact. It appears I was more worried about it than my son. I immediately went into justice mode. How dare they say that to my wee boy?! What else did they say? How did they say it?!
After a while, I pulled my head in and changed to objective questioning (not the tell me about the bully type). I then discovered that perhaps my son was lacking in certain skills to maintain friendships. It turned out that he was determined to play a particular game and the others were over that game and therefore (in five year old fashion), they were over him. I can understand it, I get over his games and determination to play them too!
So we're going to be looking at teaching him strategies to be a good friend- sharing of not just toys but ideas. Give and Take sort of stuff. It's great that he has leadership qualities (read bossy) but not so great if he doesn't let others decide the games.

Chelsea has had an interesting week at preschool. She fears a boy who said a couple of nasty comments to her. Boy did she crumble! I am surprised that she's so soft and squishy inside, and relieved that I do not need to let her into the big wide world of school just yet.
She did NOT want to go to preschool. She cried, she sobbed, she clung to me and I felt absolutely awful. I told myself that I would make her go so that she could get back on the bike again so to speak. Really I forced her as I had to be at work. My poor wee girl.
So we talked about it. I explained that the teachers would help and love her, and I explained that the wee boy was just learning too. Then we talked about not wanting to be places, but having to find 'fun' in them anyway. I said we'd make a fun book together when we got home.

When I picked her up she declared proudly, "I found fun!" and she said she had found it in the sandpit, and in afternoon tea, and various other places. I was immensely proud of her, and the fact that she faced her fears with bravery. I know it's going to be hard again next week but I'm comforted that she's going to learn how perservere when things get tough. Heck, I'm not even sure that I've learned how to do that yet!

I think that our kids are remarkably resilient, and strongly able to learn how to cope with emotional pain. It's natural to want to carry their worries for them, but we forget how capable they can be. I hope my kids develop strong, empathetic characters. I wonder how much of that will come naturally and how much I'll have to consciously guide and scaffold. Teaching them to read and write is so much more black and white!

Preschoolers and Art

When I did my 4 year degree in Education (ECE) it was drummed in to us that to foster childrens creativity, you were never to draw for them or give them colouring in pictures etc as this would stifle their creative freedom. I never really quite agreed with all of this, but who was I to question it. In fact, a peer got slandered on her practicum by a lecturer because she had drawn a face for a child.
I guess we all learn in different ways but as a youngster I firmly remember watching older kids draw at school and copying their ways of drawing and representing images. I remember loving the old 'Lettering Book' and being inspired by different fonts. Not necessarily copying them but it gave me new tools and ways to draw. Since my degree, thinking has changed but I'll always hold a slightly bitter outlook on certain things that I was brainwashed to believe.

Today my five year old Dominik was adding to his invention collection. He wanted to add a slide to his Grandy's bach (holiday home). It was to go down to the water and was to be a 'tube' as he put it. He questioned me how to draw such a shape. I turned my back on my degree, and showed him how you can draw a cylinder. He was thrilled, and confidently went to draw his slide. I think I will show him how to draw other 3d shapes, it might help him represent some of his ideas better.
We also used a book, a lift the flap one called 'See inside how things work' - it's amazing, and both kids love it. It even had a waterslide pump illustration in it, so this helped Dom understand his new design so much better. You can buy the book from book depository ....free international postage, the most tempting site I know!

So often I disagree with things I have been told. Ironically, teachers college taught and strongly emphasized critical thought, but it was only about ourselves, and our shortcomings, not about what was being taught to us. I guess putting on my parent hat, it would appear obvious to show a child how to draw something if they asked. Sometimes the gut intuition of a parent is way more logical than the learnings of an educated 'teacher.'

Early Childhood Language

So I've been teaching since 1999. That makes me feel rather old! In all that time I have encountered many children with cute lisps and speech impediments. None of which have worried the SLT's and have not worried us as educators too much.
Chelsea has the typical r=w sound "wabbit" and so on. It is a sound which reminds me she is still little, and sounds so cute to the ear. The thing I need to make sure though, is that the sounds in her head are correct. She and I had an argument the other day about which letter Road begins with. She was sure it was a W. This could prove problematic at school when she is writing, so I am going to start giving her that correct letter sound information now. Even if she can't pronounce it (although I'm not convinced that she can't, I suspect it's a bit of a habit), I will informally teach her what letters words begin with. She loves words and letters so this will be easy!

I love this chart which explains the normal realms of when children learn how to speak different sounds
http://www.minedu.govt.nz/~/media/MinEdu/Files/EducationSectors/SpecialEducation/PublicationsResources/WhenSpeechSoundsAreLearned.doc